Whew! A lot has happened since I posted last. Let’s see…
On Sunday night I became an aunty and godmother for the 3rd time (fourth if you count Caleb – although he just calls me Mands, not Aunty Mands!). Little Brayden came into the world a little earlier than expected, with a cute button nose and a shock of fuzzy black hair. I must confess, it all seemed a little unreal to me, until I saw the photo’s. Although I have this nagging ache in my heart that has been there a long time, I could not help but melt at the sight of him. He is my sister’s child, so the only thing for me to do, is love him like my own. Just like his beautiful sister Tyler, my precious godchild, Caleb, and little Mischa. They are all my children, though not from my womb. I was there for two of their births, nurtured them as babies, and watched them grow. The only sad thing about this is that my sister, and my younger brother, live in Cape Town, which is roughly 1400km’s away from me. This means that three quarters of my brood are halfway across the country. Hopefully I will go down in August to meet the new additions and tell them all about their fabulous Aunty Mands and how much she loves them, and probably spend too much money on the little munchkins. I told my sister to get a life-sized photo of me and to keep it in the house to remind the kids that they have an Aunty!
On Monday I went for my first set of bloods (four vials) and on Tuesday for the second lot (two vials). Tomorrow I am off for my HSG, which I have heard nothing but bad things about. Quite frankly, I don’t give a damn. I just want to get it done and move onto the next step. As Tam said, an infertile girl’s gotta do what she’s gotta do, and that’s that. I have a very strong feeling that I will be doing another lapscope, and that’s fine too. I have done it twice, and by damn, I can do it again. If it means that I will be closer to success, then so be it.
The house is coming along superbly. The wall and ceiling painting is almost done, and then it’s onto the floors. I guess I should start packing (not my favourite thing.) I have started to clean out all my junk so that I move a minimal amount with me. It’s very gratifying to spring clean one’s life. Out with the old, etc etc.
Just so you know, dealing with the birth of other people’s children has not become easier for me. I have just chosen to focus on my own journey. It keeps the ache under the surface, and keeps me positive. Otherwise I would be crying onto my keyboard all day. And that, dear friends, would simply not do.