More wizards and wonder…

My second wizard of infertility was Doc GC. He was a placid creature who always ran about 4 hours behind schedule. He was a run-of-the-mill gynae, who dabbled in a bit of ART. He did a couple of scans, one post coital, and announced that I seemed to have endometriosis, and would be needing a laparoscopy. (I had no symptoms of Endometriosis, other than not being able to conceive.) This is a day procedure where either two or three incisions are made into the lower abdomen, for instruments and cameras to be inserted. The offending tissue is removed (ablated) and voila! problem solved.
I went for the lapscope, and the Doc found and removed stage II endometriosis on the left ovary, which had begun to fuse to my pelvis. The left ovary had some scarring as a result.
He also said that most women fall pregnant right after their lapscope, ususally because of the D&C that is done at the same time. The lapscope came and went, months passed and still nothing. When I went to see him again, he said that the problem was probably with DH and that there was very little that could be done about that. He suggested GIFT as an option.
I was getting very despondent and decided to seek another opinion.
I went to my third wizard, Doc M. He was a foreigner, and a lovely man. After examining me he proclaimed that it would be impossible to feed his children with such healthy patients as myself, and that I would have many many children very soon.
He put me onto a low dose af Clomid, and when that did not work, he suggested I go to a fertility clinic. I want to thank him for not wasting my time further.
To cut a long story short, I went to a well known fertlity clinic in Johannesburg. After extensive blood tests, semen analysis’ and scans, I went for lapscope 2, DH was put onto a strict diet plan and we were told to give it 6 months more. The doc was convinced we would not need fertility treatment.
After 6 months, we returned, did another post coital, the endometriosis had not returned. In the meantime I had done a stress management course through the clinic, and DH carried on with his diet and pills regime.
We were told to give it another 6 months, and this was June last year.
I was watching telly one sunday evening, and Carte Blanche was doing a story on Tertia Albertyn. I was horrified to hear that she had done 9 IVF’s before having her two beautiful children. Suddenly terror crept in and I started to panic. Would I ever have children?
After five years of trying and failing, I had reached the end of my rope. DH and I decided it was now or never. And that is what brings me (almost) to the end of my first IUI cycle.

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8 thoughts on “More wizards and wonder…

  1. mom says:

    Hi my sweetheart
    Reading you blog has really made me realise just how painfull this whole procedure has been for you. Because of the special person that you are, never complaining about your dilemma, I always thought, “well she copes very well with her situation and that makes it easy for me to cope with as well. Now, since you have educated me with all the details and dissappointments, I wake up each day with feelings that are difficult to describe. Some days I am tearful, fearful and hopeful. It is as though I am on this journey now and not you. I rush to my computer every morning to read the next blog. “WHY? because it helps me to understand a little more. Yes today is the end of your first AI and I am as nervous as hell. Been to the loo 3times today and everytime I see an e-mail from you I need to take a deep breath before I open it. We are in this together now (my choice) and I look so forward to becoming a Gran soon.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx mom 🙂

  2. Mands says:

    hi mom, Thanks for the note. It helps to know that there are others out there that are rooting for my cause. Most “normal” people have no idea what we go through daily. Don’t stop praying!

  3. BF - Debs says:

    Well, I thought I would just drop a little note into the comments section to let you know, that my heart is hopeful and full of love for my BBBBF (Best, Bester, Bestest, Bestestest Friend). Your hopes and dreams are as important to me as my own. Yes, today has been a rotten day….for many reasons (a few of my own personal issues) but just the thought that my BF is sitting next to me has given me great comfort. I am sorry that sometimes I don’t have the right words, more constructive comments and encouragements, but always know that my heart beats much to the same song as yours and I am here – here to just be quiet when you need me to be, to just listen, to share a joke, or if you just need some loving arms around you…I have a capable, willing pair that I’m sure will do the job 🙂 quite satisfactorily! A Whole lot of Love – Your BF

  4. Mands says:

    And that is why we are BF’s. I don’t always want to talk about this, and just chatting about girly stuff takes my mind off. I also know that you are a great comfort and will catch me when I falter. Thank you so much.

  5. Baby Blues says:

    Mands, that comment from your mom brought tears to my eyes. She reminds me of my own mom! I couldn’t discuss our ART freely with my mom because she worries about the smallest things. I just want to spare her from the heartaches. All she knows is that we’re TTC and seeing a doctor. I just feel I have to be strong for her, and sometimes being strong means not having to share your fears. But I know my mom, even if I don’t say anything, she knows when somethings bothering me.

  6. Mands says:

    Geez Baby Blues, we really do have a lot in common, including our moms! My mom is also very intuitive. Since I told my family, they are a lot more sensitive and sympathetic, which helps a lot. I am also in the habit of protecting my family, but it was causing me all kinds of stress, which made the endometriosis worse. The main thing is that we deal with it each in our own way. When we’re ready to invite others on our journey, they willingly travel the road with us.

  7. Bumble says:

    Hi Mands, I just found your blog and wow, I can’t believe just how much we have in common! I’m 30, South African, just started my blog this month, been TTC for 6 years, did IUI, and you won’t believe it, but I am also in the Embroidery business. I work from home and digitize my own stuff. I’m living in Aus now, but I’ll be reading your blog and cheering you on from now on. I hope you get some great news with your beta today. Janine

  8. Bumble says:

    By the way, your mom is so sweet and her post had me in tears too. It makes me think thats probably how my family feels about this whole awful IF thing too.

    “well she copes very well with her situation and that makes it easy for me to cope with as well.”

    We don’t want to harp on it all the time, but inside its so devastating, and we can’t help thinking about ALL THE TIME.

    Enough from me!!!

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